Spirit Sisters
A downloadable Visual Novel for Windows, macOS, and Linux
Synopsis: Wendy, a blue-haired Demigoddess partners with a silver-haired nun named Hibiki as they face off against an evil cult that produces demons, and a newfound love begins to blossom between them."
Authors notes: Okay everyone let's go over a few things!
First, this is an original story written and drawn by me! It's a Kinetic Visual Novel derived from Egyptian Mythology, with many Egyptian Gods making an appearance.
Set in modern-day Tokyo,(and scenes in Egypt) with the two leading Heroines being sprung into the world of Gods vs Demons.
It is YURI.
There will be Yuri moments!
And it will be ECCHI!
So there will be proactive scenes...
There will also be A LOT of artwork!
This is only the demo, with only a small part of the story being covered, though it's still pretty long!
Im currently working on this independently, but soon I'll be reaching out for help on background art, music, and SFX since I don't know how to do any of that. There is some music but it's all copyrighted stuff until I require official music for it.
If you'd like to support me please consider donating, or following me on Instagram/YouTube/TikTok
But most importantly, please tell me what you think! I'll be working on this story nonstop and would love to get some feedback along the way!
Thanks for checking out my Visual Novel!
Download
Click download now to get access to the following files:
Development log
- Spirit Sisters: Scripting complete!21 days ago
- All CGs/Scenes Complete!32 days ago
- MUSIC PARTNER!57 days ago
- H-scenes73 days ago
- Spirit Sisters Update!78 days ago
- Spirit Sisters: First DevlogJul 13, 2024
Comments
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Is that index??
No her names Hibiki!
Did you draw everything in this project ? They are actually good. The thumbnail really catch my attention (my first anime is a yuri anime name "Yami to Bōshi to Hon no Tabibito" with the same cover style)
Normally i don't suggest much about any game, because every author has some talent themselves (of course including you). But i see your real effort in making this project (and yuri is my favorite), so I did a quick run and have a few suggestions.
1. The story telling style:
- Please don't use too much narrative paragraph on the whole screen, they make readers hard to focus on the scenes and low down the mood/vibe.
- Maybe you should you some black screens and some "pause" between scenes to make the story alive.
- Don't use too long sentences, and you don't need to tell everything. Just like making films or MV, readers have their own imaginations, they can pick a line, a scene, a picture/image and can feel the story in with their own view. (And some mysteries always add more feeling and curiosity)
2. The music/ambient/effect:
- This can be really hard because music is another thing, i saw a lot of authors with good story but not so good at adding music to their story, which lead to ruin the whole project. Maybe you should find someone who good at this field to collab. Trust me, with the right background music/ambient/effect, the project will be risen to another level.
- You can try to making music yourself, there're a lot of ai music generator (personally i recommend suno)
3. Scenes transition & camera:
- While your drawing really good, but the scenes transition need to be improved. You can learn them by do some research in movie making field and photo shooting experience (or some popular AVN on this site). The transitions and camera angle should be align with the scene vibe/mood, which mean they can be really fast or slowly or instant black out or changing non-stop, depend on the scenes.
4. The potential:
- This project really has huge potential and catching story. With your talent in drawing and the effort in making this, i know you can make a stunning VN.
God speed.
Thanks for the comment, To answer your question I drew everything minus the backgrounds, those are Ai.
Thanks for checking out the demo, I did work hard on it and am grateful for the feedback.
Im glad to know the Yuri spect drew you in, I've loved Yuri for so long and am so happy to finally get this story out there.
To cover your first concerns, I am trying to cut back during my proofreads in terms of pacing and narration. It's a bit hard to know what I should explain or leave out in the open.
My first approach was to write it as a web novel before converting it to the visual novel medium but I've found it to be a bit difficult.
I'll also add better transitions!
MUSIC is so important to me!
I agree it is a major aspect of creating a compelling narrative, I often watch movies/TV shows if I know it'll have a great soundtrack.
In terms of it, I do want to reach out and collaborate with someone on that front, but I am not to sure on where to start.
Right now I'm finishing the rest of the drawings, but soon I'll be working on adding music sfx, etc, thanks again for the feedback and I hope you'll enjoy the full release!
Do you use Discord ? DM me via duylouis221